THE FASTEST CAT the last time circles
return of the fool glorious visions
the songs which fill my head
THE FASTEST CAT
I WAS WAITING FOR THE RAIN TO STOP WHEN I SAW HIM – THE FASTEST CAT. HE SMILED AT ME AND I SMILED BACK. IT’S BEEN OVER A YEAR NOW SINCE HE STOPPED THE WORLD FROM SPINNING. THAT WAS A DAY I’LL NEVER FORGET.
HE’D LIVED IN AN OLD HOUSE WITH A CRAZY PROFESSOR, A PROFESSOR OF PHYSICS. THE PROFESSOR HAD SPENT HIS LIFE WORKING ON A THEORY THAT YOU COULD STOP THE SPINNING MOTION OF THE WORLD IF YOU APPLIED AN EQUAL MOTION IN THE OPPOSITE DIRECTION, CREATING A BALANCE OF CONFLICTING MOTIONS WHICH, WHEN TAKEN TOGETHER, BECOME ONE MOTION OF NON-MOTION. HE PERFECTED HIS THEORY AND WENT PUBLIC WITH HIS FORMULA: M1 + M2 = M0, WHERE M1 = -M2.
THE WHOLE WORLD REJOICED OVER THIS FEAT OF MATHEMATICAL GENIUS. HE WAS ACCLAIMED AS ‘BIGGER THAN EINSTEIN’ AND A NEW SCHOOL OF THOUGHT WAS BORN,M-ISM. THE PROFESSOR GAVE LECTURES ALL OVER THE WORLD, EXPLAINING HIS THEORY TO MILLIONS OF EAGER FOLLOWERS OF M-ISM. M-ISM GREW TO SUCH AN EXTENT THAT IT BECAME A SYNONYM FOR WISDOM: WHEN SOMEBODY SAID SOMETHING WISE, OTHERS WOULD SAY “THAT’S A VERY M THING TO SAY”, OR A WISE MAN WOULD BE CALLED AN M-MAN.
THE PROFESSOR WAS HAPPY – ALL OF HIS LIFE HE HAD WORKED ON THIS THEORY AND NOW HE HAD MADE IT A SCIENTIFIC REALITY, HE KNEW THAT THE WORLD WOULD BE A BETTER PLACE THANKS TO HIS GENIUS. HE ENJOYED 8 YEARS OF BEING ‘BIGGER THAN EINSTEIN’ AND THEN HE DIED A HAPPY DEATH.
THIS WAS EARLY LAST SPRING… NOBODY KNEW ABOUT THE PROFESSOR’S CAT AND NOBODY CARED, BUT THE CAT WASN’T AN ORDINARY CAT – HE WAS THE FASTEST CAT. THE PROFESSOR HADN’T KNOWN THIS, IN FACT NOBODY HAD KNOWN THIS, NOBODY EXCEPT FOR THE CAT HIMSELF. THE CAT HAD LIVED HIS LIFE WITH THE PROFESSOR, LISTENED TO HIS MATHEMATICAL RAMBLINGS, SAW HIS RISE TO THE PEAK OF SCIENTIFIC ACHIEVEMENT, YET ALL OF THIS TIME HE HAD BEEN LAUGHING TO HIMSELF: ‘IT’S SO FUNNY HOW STUPID PEOPLE REALLY ARE, HOW THEY ARE PRAISING A CRAZY OLD MAN WITH HIS USELESS FORMULA, WHEN THE ANSWER HE GIVES ISN’T EVEN AN ANSWER, IT’S NOT EVEN AN EXPLANATION, IT’S JUST A FEW LETTERS AND NUMBERS ON A PIECE OF PAPER. AND THE FUNNIEST THING IS THAT IT’S SO EASY TO STOP THE WORLD FROM SPINNING… MAYBE ONE DAY I’LL SHOW THEM’
HE WAITED FOR ONE WEEK AFTER THE PROFESSOR’S FUNERAL, POSTERS ALL OVER TOWN ‘THE FASTEST CAT WILL STOP THE WORLD FROM SPINNING – TOWN SQUARE – TONIGHT 8PM’. I WILL REMEMBER THIS DAY FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE.
HE STOOD IN THE MIDDLE OF THE TOWN SQUARE WITH A PIECE OF PAPER ON HIS BACK. HE WAS RUNNING AROUND IN CIRCLES, ANTI-CLOCKWISE. AFTER A FEW MINUTES HE STARTED TO SLOW DOWN, YOU COULD SEE THAT THERE WAS SOMETHING WRITTEN ON THE PIECE OF PAPER BUT IT WAS TOO SMALL TO READ WHAT WAS WRITTEN. HE STOPPED SPINNING AND SMILED, THE PEOPLE WENT OVER TO SEE WHAT WAS WRITTEN ON THE PAPER, MAYBE A NEW M-FORMULA.
IN THE MIDDLE OF THE PAPER, IN SMALL BLACK LETTERS, WAS WRITTEN ONE WORD – STOP
The last time I let myself go like this was too long ago to remember – this feels like the first, and last, time.
Tomorrow I'll swallow my ego again and all that will be left is a throbbing headache and my undernourished stomach
Carpe-Diem and all of that pseudo-realism is just a pleasant dream but the really real reality is even better,
Even if there is mass-produced rhythm and robotic ideals (idealistic robots).
Every day I am force-fed dodgy philosophy of 'Live your dreams' and 'Aim to improve',
And the truth of my absolute perfection is rejected and I am told that knowledge is power,
But the knowledge of my power is the only relevant knowledge. I need more space
I like comfortable repetition and external order, the
uniformal patterns of perception and expression make it
easier to slip into myself. The impossible contrast of my
reality and my routine is the only true creative impulse in
my life. My life, the perfect endless harmony of a silent
madness with the simplicity of happy love – the most
beautiful thing is the beauty of Beauty.
Life is always easy – that's why I like to go in circles.
The return of the fool has been promised for too long now to be seen as anything other
than a story to scare your kids but, affectionately, I'm bringing it all back home sweetly with
a touch of my infamous magic. Now we'll see who knows the best face to kick through the
sudden burst of fresh enthusiasm and long solitudes of individuality. I know that it will be
rough sailing for too many open-minded folk but it's well out of my hands, now is the one
and only chance to feel your ultimate freedom because it's nice to sit on top of the world.
Don't be confused by this outflow of emotional madness, it's just practice.
As I stand here falling through continuous shadows of my glorious visions
I am aware of the beautiful perfection of a carefully chosen way of living.
The simplicity of even the most impossible desires is pleasantly fantastic
And the visions of awareness flow through the fabrics of dreams into a new reality.
Colours gently guide us into a perfect apathy of subtle appreciation of light
Which comforts me so much that my screams reach me as gorgeous melodies.
Thank you for showing me the easy madness of purity that is me within myself.
It's about the songs which fill my head,
Wordless the melody regulates every thought
And emotions dance through me like flowers in the wind.
Peaceful, my world turns to reveal all perspectives
Of being, seeing, feeling, and just letting go,
Moving in all directions in one playful smile.
This symphony is what keeps us alive,
Tempo is only a reflection of what you think you know
But reality swallows whole dimensions of tragic beliefs,
Childishly feeding you neverending illusions of ego
Which follow impossible obvious patterns of comfort,
Until the instant of spontaneous enlightenment.
Learn to forget and throw yourself into new life,
It's about the song which fills my head.